Marcus Aurelius often reminded himself of the power he was
granted by nature—the power to choose his actions and craft his own
character. He said people can’t admire you for what’s been granted to you
by nature, but there are many other qualities to cultivate. “So display those
virtues which are wholly in your own power—integrity, dignity, hard work,
self-denial, contentment, frugality, kindness, independence, simplicity,
discretion, magnanimity.”
Recovering addicts cannot change the abuse suffered in childhood, or
maybe even before they were born. They cannot undo the choices they
have made in the past; they cannot unsnort the coke, undrink the booze,
or unswallow the pills. They cannot undo the pain they have caused for
themselves and others. But they can accept the past and try to change the
now and the future by focusing on the choices they’re making right now.
And we can do the same by focusing on what we control—namely the
choices we make every day—and taking the rest as it happens. For it is
futile and therefore/ooZzsh, said Epictetus, to worry about things that are
not up to us
The point is, William Tell can try his best to the moment he pulls the trigger, but
whether he hits the apple or the eye is not in his power. And the same is
true for us in everyday life. We can choose our intentions and actions but
the ultimate outcome depends on external variables beyond our control.
This is the reason why the Stoics advised to focus on what we control, and
let the rest happen as it will.
In modern times, we call this process focus—to focus on the process
(under our control), instead of the desired outcome (not under our
control). In archery, the desired outcome is to hit the target, but that’s not
where the focus should lie because it’s beyond our control. It’s smarter to
focus on the process that will optimally lead to the desired outcome.
The Stoics realized that the process will affect the outcome. The process is
about our behavior, deliberate practice, and all that prepares us to shoot
well.
Success, then, is defined by our effort to do everything that's within our
power. Whether we hit the target or not, whether we win or lose, whether
we drop some weight or not, ultimately does not matter. We succeed or fail
already in the process. So the Stoic archer focuses on the process
(preparing and shooting well); a possible positive outcome (hitting the
target) won’t arouse jubilation, and a possible negative outcome (missing
the target) won’t arouse despair. The Stoic archer succeeds in the process
and is ready to take any outcome with equanimity and calm confidence,
knowing they’ve tried their very best
This focus on the process, focus on what you control idea, is a massive
confidence booster. You know if you do your very best, you will succeed no
matter what It’s all you can do. If you try your absolute best at your job, in
your relationships, and for your health, then you’ll always feel confident
and at peace with yourself. This calm confidence or tranquility lies in
knowing that you did whatever was in your power, because that’s all you
control.
Even if things don’t turn out well, you can derive satisfaction from
knowing you’ve done your best. No need to justify bad results, there are
just too many uncontrollable factors influencing the outcome.
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